Saying yes to saying no

It was a course on pricing for service-based small businesses, and it would be memorable for a single line from the instructor.

“Your clients are paying you to do something,” she said. “But they’re also paying you not to do all of the other things you could be doing with that time.”

This simple notion transformed my coaching practice in a way no collection of 28 words has before or since. It led to a complete revolution in how I think about the value of my time.

When I started my business, I said yes to almost everything. I was new in this field and not fully confident I could make a living at it. It took me a while to start saying no, and I’m still not completely comfortable doing it.

In late 2022, I fired my biggest client. It was a large coaching company that had brought me success and credibility during the early days of my practice. I was also grateful that they’d taken a chance on a relatively untested coach. But years later, the technological headaches, unpaid administrative duties and relatively low pay were no longer working as well for me. I decided to wind down my tenure there.

It was a gamble. By turning down a steady stream of revenue, I’d also be making space on my calendar for clients who fit me better. But would the clients come?

They did. And I’ve used this decision making framework a few times since – not just for decisions about dollars, but for other things that matter too.

If I say no to that one additional client who might be able to squeeze their way onto my schedule somehow during a packed month, I’m also saying yes to better presence for all of my other clients. To having space in my brain for writing and helping my business grow. And to a more rested and capable dad and partner for my family when I close my laptop at the end of the day. 

Our time, energy and attention are limited resources. Once they’re gone, we don’t get them back.

If you say yes to that extra meeting, that extra assignment, that extra emailed request… what are you saying no to instead?

Previous
Previous

The dangers of hyper-niching

Next
Next

A bit about boundaries