A conversation about conversations

So, about conversations. In leadership, they're always harder when the stakes get higher and the subject matter more sensitive. Any of these sound familiar?

You have a family member who just lays it all out there. No filter. They say the hard thing without regard to the consequences. This can be hard to take.

You have a friend who focuses on feelings and relationships. After a conversation with this person, you always come away feeling good about yourself. But you wonder what's been left unsaid.

You have a colleague who tells you exactly what you want to hear. They're friendly and approachable, and then tend to turn around and do the exact opposite thing. So they're not trustworthy at all.

I've got elements of the first two, probably thanks in part to my Midwestern upbringing and Israeli roots. It might sound like a happy blend, but it's often a source of inner conflict. If I'm not as thoughtful as I can be, I risk not advocating for myself or damaging a relationship.

My clients often bring these upcoming conversations into coaching. They're struggling with a boss issue, an underperforming employee, a challenging colleague.

A few resources for your consideration about feedback and difficult conversations, two from others and two from me:

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Managing up, down and sideways

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Coaching in analogies #21: Giving feedback like a doctor would